I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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