I think i sorta joined a cult last night
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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