having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I got inside last night via doggy door
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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