Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Randomize
