Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
