Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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