so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
