Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
She needs sedatives and a leash
Also, beer. Big fan.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
