Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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