Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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