How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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