I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I will be naked everywhere
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
