We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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