Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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