i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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