Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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