I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Houston, we have a blender
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize