I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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