woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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