drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
