fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
