Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
