Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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