they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
