Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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