well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
