I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
