I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
