thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I could fuck to npr.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Randomize
