I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
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