the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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