He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Randomize
