She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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