also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
