I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize
