Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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