You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize
