My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Randomize
