great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
