Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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