I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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