It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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