the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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