I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
