I'm drive I can fine osifer
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I have so many feelings about this burrito
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
