Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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