do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
