i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize