I heard we made out
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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