you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
