Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
